Reclaiming Your Identity Post-Baby
Because You’re More Than Just “Mom”
By: Tracy L Bergier
Becoming a mother is transformative, but in the process, it’s easy to lose sight of the person you were before Baby. The hobbies, dreams, and interests that once defined you often take a backseat to the all-consuming role of motherhood.
But here’s the thing—motherhood is just one part of who you are.
Reclaiming your identity doesn’t mean loving your child any less; it means nurturing yourself so you can show up as the best version of you.
The Journey Back to You
- Acknowledge the Shift
• Motherhood changes you, and that’s okay. Instead of longing for your pre-baby self, embrace the idea that you’re evolving into a new version of yourself—one that includes, but isn’t limited to, being a mom. - Revisit Your Passions
• What used to light you up? Was it writing, painting, hiking, yoga, or playing music? Try to reconnect with an old hobby—even in small doses. - Make Time for Just You
• It’s easy to push self-care aside, but it’s necessary. Whether it’s 10 minutes of journaling, an uninterrupted coffee break, or a solo Target run, carve out time for yourself. - Set Small, Achievable Goals
• If you used to be an avid runner but haven’t hit the pavement in months (or years), start with a walk. If you dream of writing a book, begin with one paragraph. Small steps build momentum. - Reframe Mom Guilt
• Taking time for yourself isn’t selfish—it’s essential. A happy, fulfilled mom models self-love and independence for her children. - Find Your Community
• Surround yourself with people who support your growth. Whether it’s a moms group, a book club, or an online space for shared interests, connection is key. - Try Something New
• Motherhood might have shifted your old interests, and that’s okay! Maybe you’ll discover a new passion—gardening, photography, Pilates—something that aligns with the season of life you’re in now.
Quick Tips to Get Started
• Schedule “Me Time” – Put it on the calendar like any other appointment.
• Reconnect with an Old Friend – Talk about something other than kids.
• Start a Journal – Explore what excites you now.
• Say Yes to Yourself – Sign up for that class, go on that solo coffee date.
• Give Yourself Permission – You are allowed to exist beyond motherhood.
Motherhood may change you, but it doesn’t have to erase you. You are still you, and you deserve to nurture all the facets of your identity. So, here’s your gentle reminder:
Go reclaim you!
Crafty Nature Vase Bouquet
Get crafty with the outdoors! This nature-inspired art project lets kids (or kids at heart) design their own flower vase and fill it with freshly picked blooms. It’s part art, part nature walk, and 100% adorable.
What You’ll Need:
- A piece of cardboard or thick paper
- Markers, crayons, or paint
- A pencil or pen
- A hole punch or something to poke holes (like a skewer or sharp pencil)
- Fresh flowers and greenery (picked responsibly!)
Instructions:
- Draw Your Vase: Start by drawing a big, bold vase shape on your cardboard or paper. Get creative—go classic, funky, tall, short, even rainbow-striped!
- Add Holes for Stems: Carefully poke small holes above the vase drawing, where the bouquet would begin. Space them out a bit so each flower has room to shine. (Grown-up help might be needed for this step!)
- Go Flower Hunting: Head outside and collect flowers, leaves, and stems. Look for a mix of colors and textures. Wildflowers, dandelions, lavender sprigs, and even grass can all work.
- Weave Your Bouquet: Thread the flower stems through the holes so the blooms pop out above the vase. Arrange them like a real bouquet—full, layered, and lush.
- Display and Enjoy: Prop it up on a shelf, fridge, or window sill and admire your one-of-a-kind nature bouquet.
Happy Mother’s Day!
The Benicia Moms Group helps keep mom’s connected through a variety of means including our monthly newsletter, our Members-Only Facebook Group, our Member Planet Forum and our day and night meetings.
